Imitation Ghetto Gurl
That's all that I can be
"cuz there's nothing else inside this gurl
That anyone can see
All they see is the scowl on my face
And the hatred in my eyes
As everytime someone smiles and swiftly walks on by
A hurt, broken soul torn'til
death is near
A lonely, AngelGurl wishing for someone her screams to hear

Dear Sky, can you hear me



I don't know what to do



I want to forget



I want to go on



So I thought I'd start by talking to you



I know you're just a big blue eternity



But It'scomforting to me somehow



to know that God is looking through



The same sky at me right now



I know forgetting takes alot of time



But it's better than living with this forever



So I thought we could work through this pain



From here on out together



Sometimes I don't understand her even though I try and try



One minute she loves me hugs me



Then her words and threats make me wanna die



I know I can't get through this on my own



All the lies I have told



the things that I have said



All the yelling, screaming, fighing



AsI lay up in my bed



God I love her but she hurts me so much



She expects so much out of me and her heart you can't touch



It seeems like she's two people that wants to hurt and love



Sometimes i get so scared I want to meet my father above



Oh dear sky comfort me for my tears can come no more



Oh dear sky keep her away from my hearts door



Oh, Dear Sky

Love is something I have learned that usually has to hurt first. At least for me. This man, I dont know how but he has completely taken my heart and it is now his prisoner so willingly. I try day after day to just get him to realize that but it never works. I want him to love me without me telling him to. I try to do things with other people, do things he doesnt like, say things that would raise a red flag and be like hey, why is she doing that, but it never works. I just want to know he cares. That he loves me. The lies, the attitude, the outbursts, the ignorance, it hurts and all i want is for him to love me as much as i love him. I will spend the rest of my life wishing that he loved me and I dont want to do that. I just wish he could open up his beautiful eyes and look around and realize hey, mommy aint here no more. Im not 13 anymore. I have a home and a family and my girlfriend needs me to grow up. God why cant he just grow up. I love him and I need him and he just is walkin around pretending that hes still young and can do whatever, no consequences and that theres no problems but there is. I love him so much and I need him to realize that. This game playing is getting old. God I love him.

Adrian

The love of my life. I never knew that what was in my stomach would turn around and save my life. Its when this world looks nothing but a trap for me that i just want to excape that I look in his face and realize why im here. He means so much to me but sometimes i just cant handle it. Everything weighs down on me and I cant handle it. Nightmares, they dont stop. Cant talk to bryan, he wouldnt understand. If i gave him a fictional stupid computer game and a cookie hed love that and understand that but give him some real life and hes so fucken stupid. I feel so alone, but when I look in adrians eyes i can see it. He was there with me while the world was tearing me apart. He was there through the nightmares that so close came to killing me. I look in his eyes and I know he cant understand the words that are coming out of my mouth but the look on his face and the softness in his touch on my cheek and in his hug I know he understands the pain in my chest and the tears on my face. I LOVE YOU ADRIAN

Questions run ramped through your mind.
You wonder when, You wonder why
You want life to be easy
You want it to be kind
You wonder when he pain will end
When will life make sense

Questions, questions
Running through your mind
Questions, questions
Taking all your time
Why, when, where?
God, are you there?

Time is passing by so quickly
Your questions still not answered
Why did God let this happen?
Why can't I understand?
Will I make it through his life?

Questions, questions running through your mind
Questions questions taking all your time
Why, when, where?
God are you there?